If there is one underlying rule to Korean culture it is this: Image is Everything. If you want to be somebody, dress the part. Or rather, if you want everyone else to think you're somebody, dress the part.
If everyone believes you to be one thing, regardless of what you really are, do you become it? Does your true self become suffocated under the stifling opinions and stereotypes of your environment and cease to exist altogether, leaving a soulless, yet well dressed, creature? I know this sounds very deep, and philosophical, eastern and Buddhist, etc. But, in Korea, the answer is Yes. This is my attempt to understand the psychology behind such a country-wide mindset.
Maybe "soulless" creature is taking it a bit too far. I think a better description is "Fashion Chameleons." In the jungle of Korean society, apparel is the camouflage. If you want to survive, you'd better blend in, and make sure your outfit is hip and up to date, or the predators will swoop in before you can say "clearance sale."
The idea of a hand-me-down does not exist.
Every equinox there is a traditional wardrobe purification ceremony where all of last years looks are removed and burned. If anyone is caught wearing an out-of-date style (God Forbid) they get beaten with Gucci belts, then held down, and Dong Chimmed repeatedly with four inch Prada stilettos! No joke. Spring was officially announced last week and I saw six "poki-poki" attacks (as they refer to them over here) over the weekend. The worst was this poor colorblind girl who accidently wore a black skirt with a blue blouse. It's brutal over here, survival of the fittest. Any weakness is exploited, however carefully hidden.
I was even cornered one night. There I was, walking around, when suddenly, out of nowhere come ten, No, fifteen bloodthirsty, yet impeccably dressed, fashion vigilantes smelling of genuine leather and Channel No. 5. I'd been in a hurry and made the mistake of wearing black shoes with a brown belt. By the time I realized my blunder I was already outside, and I thought no one would see in the dark. But, how wrong I was. The streets of Gwang-ju are like the African Savanna, the deadliest ones are out at night. So, there I was, surrounded, and I'd left my steel diaper in my room after class so resistance was out of the question. Luckily, the week before I left the states I'd taken a "Dangerous Asian Customs Self Defense Class" and had a trump card hidden up my sleeve.
As they closed in i shouted, "I'm Canadian!"
Trust me, under any other circumstances I would have said anything BUT that, but to fashion blinded Asians, that's like dunking their heads in cold water. It's a known fact that Canadians, possessing maybe the world’s worst fashion sense, are treated like Kryptonite by Asians. They don't want the style blindness, or the quasi-American accent to rub off.
They melted away into the darkness like hyenas when the male lion arrives. But, their glowing, slanted eyes followed me all night and I had to randomly shout "Eh!" or "Aboot!" just to keep them back. By far one of the scariest nights over here, second only to my group transvestite date. (I didn't know, and yes, I was wearing my steel diaper then!)
But really, over here they take their image very seriously. I've noticed general patterns that people abide by and then branch off from.
For example, men have a peculiar image: flashy yet sensitive, impressive but not intimidating. They all dress very well, looking extremely dapper all the time, but none of them want to look tough. For the first time in my life, I’M the tough guy. I know, I know, you're all laughing hysterically, but they're all really skinny and carry a mirror. (But please don't laugh too much, I’m actually enjoying it a lot)
But, seriously, the complete image of guys is not just well dressed, but also sensitive and emotional. In TV and Movies over here, all the main actors I've seen cry. They might be doing martial arts in one scene, and then crying in the next. It blows my mind. The worst part is, most of the movies here are not action, they're dramas. So, only in a small percentage do you get guys beating each other up. But, in 100% they ball. I understand being in touch with your feminine side, yes, but letting it take over? Big No-No, Fellas. I think the book on Man Law fell off the boat bringing the Nike running suits over. They really could have benefited from Chapter One: Don't Be a Pussy. . . . and Chapter Two: Refer to Chapter One!
Still, maybe it's a good thing that there isn't much Machismo over here. Crime rate is extremely low and the people here seem to be genuinely happy. Then again, my mind keeps going back to that Ddong Chim thing. . .
The image I see in women is be cute, sweet, and submissive. And if you're wondering, that involves a lot of crying, too. Believe me, the tissue industry over here is cutthroat. But, if you think I've been a little degrading in my portrayal of women, sorry, but that's how it is over here. They doll themselves up and try to get the guy with the most expensive clothes and car, just so she can be seen with him. Oh yeah, and personality is irrelevant.
But, when you think about it, Personality is a human invention. It doesn't really have a place in the Animal Kingdom. So, when you revert back to the Law of the Jungle, as Korea has, it goes out the window with last years shoes.
The guy/girl relationship thing over here makes me think of birds, like on Planet Earth. The males are loud and flashy and the females are duller, looking to avoid predators. Remember those birds of paradise, the males looking all wild and bouncing around when the female comes by, i don't think he's saying, "Hey, and I'm a Sagittarius, and I'm member of Oprah’s book club, and I love kids." No way, Jose, he's saying "Look how big my feathers are. Look how I bounce around, all the energy and stamina I have, look how veiny my legs and feet are, how long my beak and talons are, oh yeah." That's more like it.
Korean women want birds like that. I want a bird like that. In fact, i think i want to BE a bird like that. So, stay tuned until next time, where I will dive into the specifics of fashion and reasoning by the heads of government that may have lead to such a mindset on image. In the mean time, i'm going to go buy some name brand clothes.
April 2009
-Chris
0 comments:
Post a Comment